Random Thoughts (I)

Sometimes I encounter difficulties trying to expand my ideas into full-length posts (450-750 words).  However, it does not mean that these ideas are not worth exploring at all, just that I am unable to properly channel these ideas and expand them properly into something readable.

So, I think I'll just list them under this title and write a short description for these ideas, share and probably revisit them later as I see fit.

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My accidental exposure to Jon Stewart and The Daily Show when I was 14 has brought upon such an influence to my worldview. I was waiting for a rerun of WWE Raw (heh) and got fed up when I ended up channel surfing instead. As I spent 5 minutes on CNN Asia trying to feel more sophisticated, I stumbled upon what I thought was a news segment on food and fresh produce:

Suffice to say, I ended up confused. Another segment appeared next, and that sealed the deal for me to devote myself as a lifelong Jon Stewart fan.

It opened up my eyes to the power of satire, as means to put forth points in serious issues with the aid of laughter. If our social climate allows it, I would have chosen to be a satirist for a living. I would love to write and get involved in political satire, especially given the absurdity of our sociopolitical scene. Since direct criticism just won't cut it with this bunch, why not do it with  a chuckle?

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Speaking of our current political climate, I hope that Malaysians are able to dissect the issues we have in hand properly and not simply jump into conclusions. It amazes me how some of us tend to support/ dissent wholeheartedly without really analyzing the rationale behind their side of the argument.

Zealotry is rampant, and in order for us to progress as a nation we have to get past certain elements of our local culture. As children, regardless of race and religion we are told from day one to give way to elders and prioritize them at family gatherings, to lower our heads when we walk past them, always respect them and to accept their wisdom without ever questioning their agendas and/or end games.

I am not going to argue that we should not show respect to our elders, it's just that some of us are automatically brought up into the idea that in the end, they do not know why exactly are they doing the things they do. Culturally, we are fed since childbirth with instructions and most of the time, without any proper underlying reason behind it.

Unfortunately, this also seeps into our political culture. We simply accept whatever our politicians are saying, without giving any second thoughts. As long as this policy benefits us, then the side effects are excusable. We often times see our politicians as elder figures, and we tend to trust them for that they are worth without ever really asking why.

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This does not mean those who are opposing the powers that be are doing it right, either.  What most politicians on the other end of the spectrum do not seem to get is the fact that about half of Malaysian voters are rooting for them by default. Most disillusioned Malaysians do not have much a choice, really. And they are supported by a majority of young voters not because of their understanding of our political climate, but sadly because of their inclination to rebel against the establishment.

We, as Malaysians need to learn to not simply swallow what fliers, blogs, viral videos and PR campaigns these politicians are throwing at us, regardless of which side of the argument we are on. Proper education and exposure is necessary, so that we can grow into a more well-informed and critical society. It is sad that we are making things too easy for these politicians to maneuver their way into our votes, when we still have all the power to decide what is good for our country.

What I Noticed So Far

Note: as exercise, I am going to update my blog at least once a day during the holidays. Writing, it seems, has a calming effect on my well-being. I also think that I need to hone my communication and language skills further. I especially enjoy how with each post I arrive at a point of self-realization and what I am comfortable with, not only in terms of discovering myself, but also in content and language use. Besides, I have to admit it's fun.

After last night's post, I decided to read through my blog all over again, and a few things jump out immediately. First of all, when I began writing on this blog I was in a bleak state of mind. I wrote about things as though I needed some sort of intervention to help with my predicaments. I used foul language in some of my posts and some of the metaphor and imagery that I use were... of poor taste to say the least. I had to soldier through a few of the sentences simply because of the choice of words and such. It's like watching an amateur stand-up comedian doing a very raunchy bit in desperation to win over the crowd. 

Do we have a video for that? Of course. Here's Eddie Murphy, just in case anyone needs a visual approximation of what I was trying to convey:

Secondly, I found out that I find it rather easy to talk about something abstract, and it shows in how outlandish my metaphors could be as opposed to citing facts, quotes or statistics. Well, given my choice of topics I do not think the usage of hard data would be necessary. I am still trying to find a comfortable way to write about current issues, and while I do keep myself up-to-date with these things I think I need to be able to regurgitate (poor usage of words yet again) these facts and put a personal touch to them, like an op-ed.

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Speaking of my choice of topics, I have been trying to stay out of anything that is too "heavy" because currently, I do not believe that I can add much insight into what I believe should be left out to those who are much better qualified than I am. Sure, I read a lot about American and local politics, current issues and while I am more well-informed than the average Malaysian (if you get what Eddie Murphy was talking about in the above video, congratulations. You are not an average Malaysian) at the end of the day, I am still a diploma level student. I attend classes and mingle with people four, five years younger than myself. What I say and think do not carry much weight, and probably should not.

Besides, I have to admit, I am still too young to comprehend everything that is happening around me. What I say sometimes might sound like pre-meditated wisdom, but most of the time I just relay what I have seen/ read/ heard from others, people who have experienced these problems themselves. There is a good chance that when people seek advice from me, I end up giving them a bad one.

Strip me off of my perceived logical comprehension and first-world life experiences, the only thing I believe I have any authority to talk about right now is:

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I believe wholeheartedly that life is a constant learning process. Sometimes you do things right, and by a stroke of luck you get yourself rewarded. Other times you fall down and fail, even despite your best efforts. My writing skills are still rather poor, and except for a few times due to extremely lucky breaks or horribly stupid decision-making skills my life is rather uneventful. Not that I want it any other way, though.

Right now, I am trying to learn and pick myself back up again. I believe writing helps. And tonight's realization links back to the topic I chose for my blog: The Atychiphobic Optimist. Atychiphobia is fear of failure, and an optimist sees the glass half-full. 

I am optimistic that everything I have gone through so far will paint a better, beautiful larger picture.

An Outline For The Next Few Years

A few weeks ago my friend Nasriq and I had a chat on the notion of settling down, getting married and starting a family. We talked for about twenty minutes on the subject, and while most people my age would rather touch on more exciting subjects such as football, cars (I can only guess) and such, I find it appropriate and for some reason, comforting to explore the idea. I find it weird, and for that reason I am going to dissect this oddity by writing about it.

Despite my relatively young age, I am already warm towards the idea of living a relatively quiet life with a loving wife and a child or two. This is probably because: 

1) I perceive having a family on my own as the ultimate form of stability in life, my equivalent to Israelites reaching the Promised Land. That, coupled with having a rewarding, successful career is my life's end goal.

2) I cannot stand (for the lack of a better word,) drama. While I understand the fact that interpersonal problems and internal strife such as mid-life crises and identity issues will continue to plague you until you bite the dust, I find it a lot easier to deal with these things with a life partner who can help me resolve these situations as they come.

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While I am on the subject of drama, I find it not only a bane to society's progress but it also exposes me for the selfish robot and/or six year-old boy that I can be sometimes. I have had my own share of squabbles where human emotions are put forth on the bargaining table like casino chips. Nine out of ten times I end up feeling like an idiot wasting my time spouting nonsense, and the remaining time I end up hurt.

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3) Marriage, I hope, will teach me a lot more about shared responsibilities. Whenever my friendships and relationships come unstuck, often times they are due to the fact that I can be unfair sometimes- asking too much from others while in the same time asking them to ease up on their expectations on what I should do for them. 

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I am only twenty three, but I have already lost contact with a good deal of my high school friends. In a world where connections are getting more and more important, I need to be able to at least sustain whatever relationships I have left with others. 

If I need to state a more personal reason, then fine. I do not want to die alone. If I continue being as aloof as I am right now, then there is a good chance of that happening.

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4) I find kids to be awesome. I admit, I am the kind of person who enjoy making funny expressions at three to six year-old children in shopping malls just to get feedback from them, often times to the chagrin of their parents. Yes, there is a chance that I might have terrorized your toddler in E-Mart. Get over it. 

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I can only imagine how much more awesome my kids will be, compared to others. I will shower them with books, teach them how to debate and they can finally justify me spending hours at the local Toys R' Us looking at the latest Transformers action figures. 

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Nasriq ended our conversation with a reassuring statement, and on an interesting note. He told me that there should not be a rush to settle down, as the opportunity will come only when you are wholly prepared for it. Until then, the best thing one can do is to focus on whatever goals one can achieve only when that person is still single, young and free. He proposed that I write down a list of things I want to do and enjoy before I get hitched someday, and to not touch the issue of settling down ever again until I have completed the entire list.

So, without further ado, here are the things that I wish to do before I settle down (in no particular order):

1) Finally get my fat ass in shape.

2) Adopt an outdoor sport for me to do religiously until I drop dead.

3) Learn and understand more about Islam, and devote myself wholly to it. 

4) Take up martial arts lessons. Krav Maga, anyone?

5) Hone my debating and writing skills.

6) Subsequently, win at least a debate tournament or a writing competition.

7) Get involved in a theater production, a play or a musical.

8) Start a business, and earn some sort of fixed income out of it. 

9) Complete my law degree overseas. In case you're wondering, Peninsular Malaysia counts but I think it's a cheap way to cross this item out.

10) Visit California again, meet up with my foster mom, goad her to get her job done and bring me to Legoland and Universal Studios. (in case you're reading, I'm just teasing you Mom)

11) Watch Metallica live in concert wearing my Baju Melayu just to confuse the hell out of everyone and singlehandedly make kilts passe.

12) Attend a WrestleMania wearing the same Baju Melayu I wore for the Metallica concert. (If I get ringside seats, wouldn't I be promoting Malaysia, in a way? Ministry of Tourism, you're welcome.)

13) Visit the set of The Daily Show and/or The Colbert Report for a taping of these shows.

14) Travel around Southeast Asia and the United States on backpacking trips.

15) Bring my entire family for my graduation ceremony. I owe them that.

16) Start a career as a lawyer, and finally move out of my parents' house.

17) Earn enough money so that my income statement alone can help me win any argument against my future in-laws.

18) On that note, ensure that my future in-laws are not the arguing kind. Or maybe I ought to mature to a point where they are convinced that they can hand over their responsibilities to me, and not worry them too much whenever I take their daughter out for dinner or something. Either one works.

19) Have a house built in Kuching, a place where my family can live for generations to come.

20) Tell my future wife about the events that lead to me writing this list.

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I'll end this post with something my dad told me a while back, which serves as a counterpoint; "A life planned isn't as interesting." With a list that exciting though, we'll see.